“Marriage Is Not a Word, It Is a Sentence“

Being into a state of adulthood echelon, having ideation of intimacy, love and belongingness, then matrimony- I have come to presume the above quotation I heard from my Dad. “I am” is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that “I do” is the longest sentence? Funny to have these kind of thoughts in my mind, being into a position of abstraction between marriage, marriage problems and divorce, having been single and being engage, it is daunting to think of the potentialities of failing your marriage in the near future and not working it out because both of you were incapable to convey you the happiness you have always sought and imagined.

For a married couple to expect perfection in each other is unrealistic. When having thoughts about real love stories, I look at my parents as the best illustration of “marriage” that happened to be unbeaten and sealed in spite of it all, for better or for worse. In my early years as a child, every morning, I hear my mother screech and yelling at my father, and vice versa. They loathed each other, they had interactions of mean conversations, and yet, after a couple of hours, they are back together as the sweet, calm lovers all over again.

The cycle lives on- over and over, until I reached this epoch of adulthood. I have been a spectator of how fiery their marriage to marriage trouble was, how they almost breakdown as husband and wife, and as parents to their children. Infidelity also knocked both of them. Yet, believe it or not, they were trapped with each others company; they never parted ways, got divorced, or found someone new. How did they overcame each testing and made it until now? All I know is that they were able to pursue their marriage even though they have irreconcilable differences as an individual. I suppose it’s about keeping love alive, learning how to fall in love over and over again, not taking each other for granted, forgiveness, trust. Whatever it is, it works for them. Isn’t that the point of relationships, you both aren’t having a good time but you’re both there for each other no matter what? Saving marriage isn’t always easy, but it isn’t rocket science, either. If you can combine the right perspective with the right plan, you can save your marriage. Learning a lot from my parents when it comes to marriage made me think about my future with my lifetime partner.

The moral of their story is apparent. It is just as partner changes, change happens to partner too. It’s a law of relationships. If you aren’t getting what you need or want from your loved one, instead of trying to convince him or her to change, why not change your approach to the situation? Why not be more pragmatic? If what you’re doing (talking to your partner about the error of his/her ways) hasn’t been working, no matter how sterling your logic, you’re not going to get very far.

Be more flexible and creative. Be more strategic is more reliable, you can ask for marriage counselling if you have to. Spend more time trying to figure out what might work as opposed to being hell bent on driving your point home, Read more books about helping your marriage and or “save my marriage” books and articles. You might be pleasantly surprised. Remember, insanity has been defined as doing the same old thing over and over and expecting different results. Kudos to my father, he gave me such unforgettable lessons in life.

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Help your Marriage and Make it one of a Kind!

Helping your marriage has two parts where partners can discuss a lot about how and what they are going to do with every little things happens into their lives has come out and now with reasons where both of them decides they can’t get through and continue the relationship together. It is the willingness to repair damages and the thing they called IT IS OVER.

There is always a position to give out the most effective way to preserve a relationship, do relationship advises and give tips on keeping your marriage happy, agreeable, long lasting and of course one of a kind!  Reality is much more interesting than happily ever after. There is always been many ways to hold things up, especially when the couples can see it is more because of adjustment, a matter of understanding and loving more.

Marriage isn’t at all what is expected to be, Yes! It has a lot of marriage trouble, don’t expect it would be as easy and smooth like a paper. Couples should not mind that it’s all over after wedding ceremony; both should make a lot of things to do maintain the happiness and love. Think of surprises like box of chocolate and a flower on a date. A bonding moment like spa and massage or long vacation together will also be that effective in any means. Every couple should also have a strong relationship with god as it is the primary source for will and wisdom. Attending a regular couple therapy will help relationship and marriage to know learn more things which couples haven’t learn from their experiences.  Do research, learn and read more on what else you can do to save marriage in a GOOD and acceptable way.

When each of us reminds self to make a life-long commitment, you can start to appreciate the real meaning of perpetuity, and every point of divergence is an opportunity to describe the marriage. When disagreements crop up, we make more of an endeavour to put ourselves in our partner’s shoes. We distinguish that, as with everything in life, we have to accept the good with the bad.

As a long-time observer of relationships, I can tell that, like children, marriages go through different developmental stages and predictable crises. But because people are unfamiliar with the normal hills and valleys of marriage, these predictable transitional periods are often misunderstood, causing over-reactions. Those who manage to weather these universal stormy periods usually come out the other side with greater love and commitment to their spouses.

I’m convinced that if more couples realized that there really is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, they’d be more enthusiastic to tough it out through the downpour. The dilemma is, most people fool themselves into thinking that whatever stage they are in at the moment is where they will be forever. But it’s important to remember that nothing lasts forever. There are seasons to everything in life, including marriage, divorce shouldn’t be put in mind, stop divorce advice that is anyone is offering. You read more books about helping your marriage; I also have more articles for you to read on. The wiser and more mature you become in this so called flow of love, the more you realize functions of each part.

Look, life is short. We only have one go-around. Make your relationship the best it can possibly be. Stop waiting for your partner to change in order for things to be better. A solution of avalanche begins when you up and decide to do change yourself first.

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Love in Marriage is indeed a “DECISION”. Not just a feeling…

The Scriptures say that God designed and created marriage as a good thing. It is a beautiful, priceless gift. He uses marriage to help us eliminate loneliness, multiply our effectiveness, establish families, raise children, enjoy life, and bless us with relational intimacy. But beyond this, marriage also shows our need to grow and deal with our own issues and self-centeredness through the help of lifelong partner. If we are teachable, we will learn to do one thing that is most important in marriage – to love.

Every relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love is easy. It’s a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades and marriage troubles begin. It’s the Natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother, touch is not always welcome, and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. At this point going to relationship counselling would be the advised.

The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage and marriage problem, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you’re in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage. At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, “Did I marry the right person?” And reflects on the euphoria of love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else, getting worst and leads to divorce. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfilment. The Key to succeeding in marriage is not finding the right person; it is learning to love the person you found.

Love and Acceptance is about learning and daring to live a life filled with loving relationships. And this journey begins with the person that is closest to you: your spouse. But be sure it will take courage; take the view that instead of following your heart, you are choosing to lead it. The world says to follow your heart, but if you are not leading it, then someone or something else it. This shouldn’t end up this way, if you want to save your marriage, read more about what else you can do for it, couple therapy may also do.

The Bible says “the heart is deceitful above all things,” and it will pursue which feels right at the moment. After reading bunch of tips to save your marriage, and have the key to a lasting relationship, I was able to bump on the most idealistic, yet fulfilling dare to every individual who is willing to take the risk and build his/ her marriage with a firm, lasting foundation.

It is not a process of trying to change your spouse to be the person you want them to be.  You’ve no doubt already discovered that efforts to change your husband or wife have ended in failure and frustration. Rather, this is a journey of exploring and demonstrating genuine love. Even when your desire is dry and your motives are low. The truth is love is a decision and not just a feeling. It is selfless, sacrificial, and transformational. When love is truly demonstrated as it was intended, your relationship is more likely to change for the better. Learning to truly love is one of the most important things you will ever do. Love advices will surely bring new sparks.

“Now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is LOVE.”

(1 Corinthians. 13:13).

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Fireproof your Marriage Part 1: Verse In line (Spiritual boosters)

“Fireproof” does not mean there will never be problems. It means that when there are problems, you will be able to stop them from hurting your marriage. Maybe at some point of your marriage you’ll ask yourself, “Did I marry the right person for me?” Relationship advices and “save my marriage programs will then follow… Yes it is right, but is your spiritual relationship to god still strong? Are you ready to fireproof your marriage? Then let us begin the journey.

Love is patient. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. ~ Ephesians 4:2 NIV.

Love is kind. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. ~ Ephesians 4:32

Love is not selfish. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor. ~ Romans 12:10.

Love is thoughtful. How precious also are your thoughts to me…. How vast is the sum of them! ~ Psalm 139:17

Love is not rude. He who blesses his friend with a loud voice early in the morning, it will be reckoned a curse to him. ~ Proverbs 27:14.

Love is not irritable. He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit, than he who captures a city. ~ Proverbs 16:32.

Love is not jealous. Love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire. ~ Song of Solomon 8:6 NIV.

Love Cherishes. Husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. ~ Ephesians 5:28

Love is honorable. Live with your wives in an understanding way… ~1 Peter 3:7

Love promotes intimacy. He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends. ~ Proverbs 17:9 NIV

Love seeks to understand. How blessed is the man who finds wisdom, and the man who gains understanding. ~ Proverbs 3:13

Love is satisfied in God. The Lord will continually guide you, and satisfy your desire. ~ Isaiah 58:11

Love is faithful. I will betroth you to me in faithfulness. Then you will know the Lord. ~ Hosea 2:20

Love vs. Lust. The world is passing away, and also its lusts; but the one who does the will of God lives forever. ~ 1 John 2:17

Love forgives. What I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, I did it for your sakes in the presence of Christ. ~ 2 Corinthians 2:10

Love is responsible. When you judge another, you condemn yourself, since you, the judge, do the same things. ~ Romans 2:1 HCSB

Love makes sacrifices. He laid down His life for us. We should also lay down our lives for our brothers. ~ 1 John 3:16 HCSB

Love and Marriage. A man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. ~ Genesis 2:24

Love meets sexual needs. The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. ~ 1 Corinthians 7:3

Love is accountable. Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed. ~ Proverbs 15:22 NIV

Love agrees in prayer. If two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father. ~ Matthew 18:19

Love endures. Love never fails. ~ 1 Corinthians 13:8

Put verse in every little thing happens in your marriage positive or negative, boost your spirit and your faith to god, this will help much! Have a regular couple therapy and everything will find its perfect time to re puzzle the board of your marriage life.

Sustaining love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It’ll never just happen to you. You can’t “find” lasting love. You have to “make” it day in and day out. That’s why we have the expression “the labor of love.” It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it Takes WISDOM. You have to know what to do to make your marriage work, and to get rid of divorce and any marriage problem that you encounter. Make no mistake about it.

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Fireproof your Marriage Part 11: The Dare

From the verses of Part 1, now, how will you “take it to action”? These dare help you determine things that you need and responsible of to do to your spouse, this brings a perfect treatment in every little things happens to your marriage life. There are specific Things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage. Take time to read and let the negative forces like worst marriage problems, divorce, marriage troubles all dissolve through these simple dares.

-Do demonstrate patience and say nothing negative to your spouse.

-Do at least one unexpected gesture as an act of kindness. Buy your spouse something that says, “I was thinking of you today.”

-Contact your spouse with no agenda other than asking how he or she is doing and if there is anything you could do for them.

-Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause him or her to be uncomfortable or irritated simply to gain their perspective.

- Make a list of areas where you need to add margin to your schedule. Then list any wrong motivations that you need to release from your life.

-Get two sheets of paper. On the first, write out positive things about your spouse. Then do the same with negative things on the second. Place both sheets in a secret place. At some point during the remainder of the day, pick a positive attribute from the first list and thank your spouse for having this characteristic.

-Think of a specific way to greet your spouse that reflects your love for them. Do something out of the ordinary today for your spouse.

-Choose a gesture that says, “I cherish you” and do it with a smile.

-Purposefully neglect an activity you would normally do so you can spend quality time with your spouse.

-Pray for three specific areas where you desire for God to work in your spouse’s life and in your marriage.

-Prepare a special dinner at home, just for the two of you and focus this time on getting to know your spouse better in areas you’ve rarely talked about.

-Look back over the dares from previous days and assess your need for God to change your heart to love. Ask Him to show you where you stand with Him, and ask for the strength and grace to settle your eternal destination.

-Dare to take God at His Word. Dare to trust Jesus Christ for salvation. Dare to pray.

-Say to your spouse in words similar to these, “I love you. Period. I choose to love you even if you don’t love me in return.”

-Remove any addiction or influence that’s stealing your affections and turning your heart away from your spouse.

-Identify every object of lust in your life and remove it. Replace it with the sure promises of God and a heart filled with His perfect love.

-Whatever you haven’t forgiven in your mate, forgive it today. Think of one area where your spouse has told you you’re expecting too much and tell sorry

-Recognize one of the greatest needs in your spouse’s life. Whether the need is big or small, purpose to do what you can to meet the need.

-Say “I love you,” then express love to them in some tangible way.

-Confess a “leaving” issue to your spouse, and resolve to make it right.

-Try to initiate sex with your husband or wife in a way that honors what they have told you (or implied to you) about what they need from you sexually.

-Find a marriage mentor.

-Ask yourself what your mate would want if it was obtainable and commit it to prayer together.

-Write out a renewal of your vows and place them in your home.

Love is NOT a mystery. Let your spouse know you desire to include them in your upcoming decisions, and that you need their perspective. Read more articles that is for sure give you much of things to keep and use, having a marriage counsel will then lead you in a more mature being.

Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), There are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise Program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your Relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It’s a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable… You can “make” love. Love believes the best, it believe all things, hopes all things.

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Marriage is Fun! Marriage should be Fun and Interesting!

It is man’s nature to love. As we grow up, different kinds of loves is introduced. As we become mature, we find this person that we get attracted to, and eventually we fall to them. If the two of you become lovers, talking about marriage is the next step. When we talk and plan about this, we should be serious and sure that we want to commit the rest of our lives to that person we love.

Other relationships were not successful to run a full time and lifetime commitment to his other half. It is because some of them do not know how to make marriage a fun and a learning experience to grow in a positive way. They do not know how to handle their common marriage problems. Maybe they were not yet emotionally, mentally, and most especially spiritually mature to get in there. Some just lost the love or interest they had for the other and they end up hooking up with other person who can give them what they wanted. And this is the start of a war. They just jumped immediately into that basin without thinking a million times if they can swim in there forever. If you think your marriage is failing, here are some major tips and love advice on how to bring back a happy marriage life.

  1. Communication – This is the key to any kinds of any relationship- whether be it with family, friends or your loved one. Do not keep your thoughts unattended. It will only create bigger marriage problems in the future.  You should listen to what each other says. Each word that comes out from your mouth must be honest and sincere that it would help you solve your problem. Communicate but do not nag, yell or curse. Keep communication calm and sane. If you think your conversation is making the other angrier, pause for a while and resume when both of you calm down. Pushing the conversation when angry might end up in regrets.

 

  1. Trust – This is very a big issue in marriage. Temptation will always come to our doorsteps. Some grab it, while those who are loyal and sincere to their pair will not.  But before you end up attacking your spouse because of some gossips you heard from friends, you must be able to support your assumption. Make sure to tell him how you truly feel.  Other than that, always trust your partner. You could not have married him if you are unsure of how he really feels about you, right?

     

    1. Give and take- There will always be a time that one of us will feel really down, inconsiderate and insensitive. We felt bad throughout the day that we end up hurting our spouse with words we did not really mean to say. If your partner is feeling that way, do not meet him with loud and hurtful words too. Instead, understand and comfort him. Assure him that you will always be there to help. And that you will not leave him no matter what happens. On the other hand, if this becomes consistent, you might seek the marriage counseling or someone professional. If your spouse is hurting you verbally and physically, then you must seek help from law. That is alarming and risky.

     

    1. Never forget- Some couples, as they grow old they lose love on their partners. This is because they forget to remind how they love each other and why they are married. Say and show how much you love and care for them everyday. It is not that hard. Do it before going to sleep and when you wake up. Do not forget anniversaries and birthdays. Make them feel loved by getting them their favorite food and bringing them to their favorite place. That could be the best time to reminisce the old days when you are still young and starting to build a relationship. Rekindle the fire again.

     

    Marriage is fun. But you cannot erase the fact that there will always be hardships. Couples will really encounter trials. That is part of life. Every single person will always have trials. The best thing about being married is that there will always be that person who would willingly like you to share your problems. Learn more couples therapy techniques from related articles, show up interest in reading and taking things up fromsave my marriage books and articles, it simply helps!

     

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